4dp5dt

Today is 4 days past a 5 day transfer. I took both a cheapo test and an FRER test this morning and both were unmistakingly negative. Last night I had slight carmping as I did the day before (usually associated with slight constipation) but then this morning nothing. This evening I have had a few moments of some cramping similar to my period starting. I recall this when I was pregnant with Leiland and it lasted a long time. So maybe thats hopeful?

Today I had this sad feeling come over me that it just didn't work. I know its SO freaking early but it wasn't because of a lack of symptoms. I can't pinpoint where the feeling came from.

As we entered into this cycle I barely entertained the idea that it might not work. I just figured our chances were really good because the two other times were a success the first time each. Then when they told us the quality of the embryos (blastocytes) was good and just ok, I was a little nervous. And right now I just don't have a strong feeling.

We shall see. I will test again tomorrow. I will inspect the readout of the test so closely. I can always see where the line SHOULD be, just its not always there. Then I will wait a little longer. Test again Thursday, and Friday. Just to see.

I got my first bfp with Leiland at 7dp3dt (10 dpo) and tomorrow I will be the same 10dpo. We shall see.