Back on Topic

So I started this blog to have a place to "get it all out" about our troubles starting a family, but I also want to keep this after our family comes along. I want to document our life ana have our far away family feel as though they are apart of the everyday life stuff. I haven't given my blog address to anyone yet, but eventually I will. I still have a lt to update.

Anyway, I haven't been posting about our struggles yet, so I think its time I get back to the topic of the blog.

I have recently taken all of our baby clothes up to one of the spare rooms here. It is the ?Mirror Room" as we have labeled it. This room is the only one that touches our room, but it also doesn't get direct sun in the morning. I have already decided (for now anyway) that this is the room I want to be the nursery. In our last house here in CA, I didn't bring any of the baby stuff in. But it didn't help much. I just spend many days looking through it all in the garage instead. So this time, I am not holding back. I brought it all in the house. That WILL be my babies room one way or another, so why not put it in its place now?

But when it comes to baby things, I have an obsession. I can't help but looking through it all and thinking about my little girl or boy wearing that dress, or that pajama set. I will admit, its mostly dreams of a little girl though. Our first pregnancy I thought it was a girl, our last one was a girl, and well I have a TON of little girl clothes.

We have already chosen when we will be starting our next round of IVF, so now I look at each piece and think, will she fit in this one at the right season? If she is small this one might fit. I can't really help it, but it makes the days a little easier. Occasionally I will pull something out to donate to good will but for the most part the stash just grows. I also love looking at different coordination's of outfits to see what I like together. I even have been known to look at them and see which ones would be cute together, if we had twins. Obsession, I know.

But I really can't help it, its the only way I know how to look ahead at the future.


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